Hospital Stint – Full Medical

Defect-Free!

Today I was given a form in Thai outlining what medical tests were required for my work permit to be processed. Having been out till 5am after watching England lose like trolls, I was very concerned about my state of health and blood-alcohol level.
The hospital was first class. You have to hand it to Thai people, they know how to run a slick operation (excuse the pun) I always get the feeling of being in a spa when I am in any hospital in Thailand. There is usually comfortable modern furniture, silk scatter cushions, beautiful plants, water features, views from the windows and an incredible sense of pride emitting from the staff who smile to you and each other. I love flicking through the glossy brochures with beautiful smiling women promising pain-free laser hair removal or gout treatment and diet management.
I was ushered from room to room for a list of various tests and examinations. When the chest X-Ray dude asked me to remove my shirt and put on the gown provided I shuddered at the thought of a starched hospital gown kicking of disinfectant. Low and behold, there, hanging in my private wooden locker, was a (slightly)trendy light gray wrap-around jacket with cute ties at the back. I actually caught myself admiring it in the mirror. Despite one British doctor who had cold, shaky hands and an abrupt bedside manner, the Thai doctors and nurses were amazing and gentle.
Once prodded, drained and weighed I was asked to relax in the waiting room. This room was more like a VIP First Class airport lounge. Pretty embroidered chairs were positioned next to huge windows which over-looked the lush hospital park (yes, you read that right, hospital park). Local and foreign magazines lined a wooden table. A bar with cookies, croissants, freshly cut fruit platters, sweet cakes, tea, coffee, milk, hot chocolate and water was stationed in the corner. I munched on cookies, fresh cut fruit and sipped fresh apple juice while they prepared my results.
Just to confirm I am officially free of: Leprosy, TB, Drug Addiction, Chronic Alcoholism (thank God for that) Elephantiasis and Syphilis. Although a rather odd mix of work permit requirements I am indeed happy that the 15 G&T’s I consumed last night didn’t appear anywhere for my new employers to see.

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1 comment so far

  1. Lisa on

    aaah excellent…and people wonder why so many people go there for plastic surgery & stuff? too brilliant!


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